281 - Eh.

Haven't been posting as much lately. Sort of just been feeling... blah. And pensive. Lots of stuff on my mind... life stuff. Worries. Hopes. Fears. Mostly hope. All that adult shit. I'm not going to get into the details. I know that sounds cryptic, but don't worry, it's potentially a good thing, nothing dire. I just have to stay positive and have faith, which... isn't easy for me... but anyway. (sorry, saying all that is without actually saying anything is a little like telling a joke and forgetting the punchline, isn't it?)

Thyroid tests came back normal. That may be playing a role in how I'm feeling too. I'm very frustrated about it. I'm not a hypochondriac but I feel like one when it comes to my thyroid, because it's always in the normal range. They even read me the numbers and ranges. So now I guess I can only come to the conclusion that it's something I'm doing wrong. Honestly, I should go to bed earlier. I could eat better. But holy hell, even if I changed nothing except that I exercised, you'd think I would still come out ahead. Enough of that, I'm getting irritated.

Watched The Road today. Debated strongly about whether I wanted to do that or not, because I'd already read the book. I have to say, it was very true to the book. Bleak. Gloomy. Hopeless. Didn't help my mood any.

You all know by now that pretty much everything makes me think... so what I thought as I experienced this story for a second time is that... I'm screwed. In a situation like that, I'd be paralyzed by fear, but unable to give up. Can you imagine what kind of life that would be??? I don't know what the hell kind of Apocalypse they were experiencing that everything was burning for over nine years, but whatever it was... it was not good. The people in that book were not good. I know that when it comes down to brass tacks, people would revert to more animalistic behavior, but these people went far beyond even that. It was disturbing. It played on one of my fears, cannibalism. And I realized it's why I don't like zombies. It's not just that they're mindless eating machines, intent on only one goal, it's that they used to be one of us. Yeah... okay... they're not real... but they still freak me out!

Yesterday I watched Valentine's Day. Eh. Didn't make much of an impression on me. Have to say that I didn't expect that it would. Any time I've ever seen a movie with that many household names in it, it has failed to impress. I don't know why I never learn. Well... I do... it was free. For that matter, so was The Road. All it cost me was my time, and a little of my happiness! ;p

Hope everyone is enjoying their weekend, but more than that, I hope everyone remembers what Monday is all about. Memorial Day is a little like Christmas in that people love the crap out of a holiday, but they kind of forget what it's really all about. So if you know a veteran, make sure you tell them that you appreciate them, and also keep the families of those who have lost loved ones, or have loved ones far from home, in your prayers. We take a lot for granted... we don't have to do the dirty work, but we sure appreciate the freedoms we have.


  1. I'm sending you four, not three, but four cheers that you feel better this Memorial Day weekend. :) So true about the holiday. These days it feels like it's all about the big bbqs and going to the beach instead of celebrating the sacrifices and fight of our veterans,

  2. I can't remember the doctor's name, but I heard this thyroid expert talking about how according to his research traditional thyroid tests won't show most problems.

    Seeing as how you love the apocalypse stories, I was curious, have you ever read any John Wyndham? (I have a Wyndham themed post coming up which is why I was thinking of him)

  3. I need to give you a name of a place, local, that specializes in just what you need for your suspected thyroid issues. You can do a little research and see what you think.

  4. These thyroid issues must frustrate the hell out of you, feeling blah and tired for no reason sucks.
    Actually, feeling blah and tired sucks even if you know the reason, but at least then you could 'fix' it.

  5. Your last paragraph is so true. Thanks for saying that.

    One suggestion: try a comedy movie, perhaps. (It's pretty much all I can handle these days that doesn't further enhance any already present depressive feelings.)
    Keep faith,