207 - Shortie

So I’m reading my email and this advertising pane to the side says, “Swat Team Openings: Immediate Openings in 47 US States. We need your help. Starting Salary of $63,790.00 A Year”


Couple of reactions: Nice money... Shouldn't 'Swat' should be SWAT? My belief in your legitimacy has already begun to decay unless this is a team of renegade mosquito and fly swatters... Why do we need all these SWAT members?... 'US States' is redundant… Why is 'A' capitalized when 'of' is not…

So many questions, so little time...

Also, we got a company email telling us to 'dust of our boots' because the rodeo is coming, or Go Texan day is nigh, or some other redneckish nonsense is afoot (I kid... I like rednecks...)... am I right in thinking we're supposed to dust our boots off, or is there some magic in the dust of our boots?

Hell, I'm the girl who claims Jesus turned wine into water... what am I being all uppity about?

For some reason I was just thinking about Jack Handy... anyone remember Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy? My favorite was this one:

The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.

But this one also cracks me up:

We used to laugh at Grandpa when he'd head off and go fishing. But we wouldn't be laughing that evening when he'd come back with some whore he picked up in town.