167 - Playing Catchup

In today's episode of Kristy's Too Too Exciting Life, our heroine finds herself immersed in all kinds of stimulating activities.

Thus far in my day I have:

Midnight to 2 A.M. - Watched From Hell. Wiped drool from chin -- not from falling asleep, but from gazing upon the facade of one Mr. Johnny Depp. I need a moment...

2:01 A.M. to undetermined time - Watched silly Lifetime Movie, as LMN is one of the few stations that run all night without reverting to infomercials.

8:00 A.M. - Woke up to Demi Moore and Michael Douglas gettin' it on. Decided it wasn't a nightmare, but a movie. Decided that instead of attempting to go back to sleep, I should get out of bed. After days of hoping I would be chosen to participate in Extreme Makeover build, I begin to hope they won't contact me for the 9 P.M. to 3 A.M. shift this evening. I am already sleepy, and it's really cold, and I hear that for some warped reason they don't let you wear jackets. Whisky Tango Foxtrot? (I stole that from a friend, it was too clever)

Once my day truly began, I was off like a shot!

• Put away clean dishes - Done.
• Pluck eyebrows - Done
• Install cheap-o plastic wine glass rack to free up valuable cabinet space - Done.
• Curse because cheap-o plastic wine glass rack broke in two places - Done and done again.
• Put wine glasses in rack anyway - Done.
• Water cats and plants - Done.
• Clip recipes from Martha Stewart's Living magazine that I will probably never make but feel compelled to have on hand. Discard remainder of magazine - Done.
• Begin pre-grocery store ritual - sort through coupons to discard expiring coupons and select coupons I may use today - Done.
• Order 30-Day Shred DVD (upon recommendation from friend and watching short clip on YouTube) - Done.
• Overcome desire to purchase additional DVD's - Done.
• Sort through/pay bills - Done.
• Get free annual credit report to verify that those bastards at Bank of America * did indeed close my credit cards without telling me (not that it's a huge deal since I never used them, but a) it was part of my debt to credit ratio and b) Shouldn't they tell me? You know... in case I was intending to use them? - Done.

Now all I have left is the always unappealing task of scooping cat poop, as well as doing a load of laundry, stripping the bed and putting on fresh sheets, starting a load of dishes, and going to the grocery store.

I know what you're thinking... you're thinking I need to slow my roll, people's lives aren't meant to be this exciting. And you may feel a slight twinge of jealousy. I can't help who I am. Don't hate the player, hate the game.

* Yesterday I spent another unpleasant hour on the phone with these dumbshits. In total, I sent two (unanswered) emails and made four phone calls. Yesterday alone I told the automated system that yes - I did want to speak to a representative (it asked me three times before it would do it, and I got to go through that system three times, what did it think I was joking???). I re-told my story to seven representatives and sent one fax. It has been two months since I first began the dispute over an erroneous $6 fee they charged me, because there is no followup at Bank of Stupid. Once a customer service rep submits my claim, it's up to another department to take the next step, and apparently they keep dropping the ball. A supervisor agreed to check back on my account and if he saw no activity he would take action on it. We'll see. I have very little faith in this bank anymore. So the closing the credit accounts was adding insult to injury, and whenever I buy another house, I'm done with them.